4 Behaviors That Destroy Relationships

We all want a happy, healthy connected relationship with our partners; however, we sometimes find ourselves disconnected. When we are in our cycle of disconnection, we can make the disconnection worse by our behaviors. Dr. John Gottman (you can check out other blog posts about him here) found that if your relationship demonstrates any of the four following behaviors your...[ read more ]

Turning Towards

Turning Towards: This simple act will help you improve your relationship. I love reading relationship advice, most of the stuff we read on Facebook, hear in church bible study, and hear on the daily morning shows is awful advice. Just this last week I was talking to a family member who was speaking about the excellent advice they got about...[ read more ]

Podcast Episode 21 – Relationships – Does Looking At Porn Hurt My Wife

  In this week's Podcast, I share my reason on why pornography hurt your partner. You can read more about his on my blog post here:  Does Looking At Porn Hurt My Wife If you would like to learn more about Porn Addiction check out my blog here. Reasons why Pornography hurts your wife. Break the assumption of monogamy Porn objectifies women You...[ read more ]

You’re Not The Person I Fell In Love With

One of the most common statements that I hear in my therapy practice is "your not the person I fell in love with." Sometimes that changes to "your not the same person anymore, or you had changed from when we first got together." I believe that this is one of the most common reasons that lead to disconnection in a...[ read more ]

After the Affair Book Review

Book Review After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful I love reading books that help inspire me, challenge me and change me. I struggle to find books that are helpful and not just the feel-good self-help type of book. Working with my clients, I will recommend books that offer more than a...[ read more ]

Never feel bad again.

  You will never feel bad again after reading this. During therapy, I always to ask my clients how are you doing today? The response that I get is varied but falls typically into three different types of categories. The first is "I'm good," usually this means that everything in life is going well, no major stressors, and an overall...[ read more ]

Why are you in fight mode?

Question: Why you are in fight mode? Answer: You put content before emotions. Have you ever gotten into a fight, argument or disagreement with your significant other and felt like you talked in circles for hours on end? Does it feel like this fight never gets solved? Alternatively, do you feel like you keep saying the same thing over and...[ read more ]

Primary and Secondary Emotions

What Fighting About the Dishes Taught Me About Primary and Secondary Emotions. When I was in grad school, I found myself getting so angry when I would get home after a long day. Why was I upset the dishes still dirty, still sitting in the sink! I could feel my blood starting to pump more and more; I could hear...[ read more ]

Couple Bubble

To build a relationship that last one of the most important concepts that a couple can grasp and practice is a couple bubble.  When I worked with children in vacation bible school one of the first things that we would cover is the “purple circle.” this is where we would teach the children to put their arms all the way...[ read more ]

Types of Counseling Therapy

Types of Psychotherapy What is the difference between counseling and therapy? It is confusing for me to know the difference between the types of counseling, therapy and then add in psychotherapy, it is enough to make my head hurt. I hope to clarify the difference. In researching about this I found that first, you need to understand the type of mental...[ read more ]

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